Family Embraces and Epiphanies
My brother, who lives in Madrid and often travels to the UK for work, arrived in Glasgow on Wednesday to hang out with me until Sunday.
Yesterday we went to Dunkeld to see the cathedral and walk along the river. Then we drove to see the Queen's View, where during a grand tour of Scotland, Queen Victoria declared the view there to be the best of all, (thus immediately turning it into a tourist attraction). Near the car park we saw a beautiful wood carved sculpture of a mother and child. Sadly no information about the artist was listed. After that we went to Pitlochry for a walk in town and then dinner at the Moulin Inn, where they make their own ale, and I gratefully drink it.
Like mom, my brother doesn't like photos taken of him. I have learned long ago to not even try. so no photos of my bro posted here today.
There is something so comforting about being with someone who has almost always been in my life, particularly with him being so accepting of me as a gay man. I know in my own experience of embracing myself, having family embrace me too has made a huge difference. I know for many of us we do not have this gift and have to create new families for ourselves.
Back in 2004 I wrote about The Gay Blessing. In the piece I conclude,
In our community, the queer community, we have the priviledge to bless one another, to undo curses that misguided and narrow parents may have heaped upon their children. We have the power to love each other back to life and give the blessing.With the celebration of the Epiphany, I hope that we find the affirmation we need to fully live our lives and that we will not underestimate the power we contain to bless each other.
posted by Peterson Toscano @ 10:25 AM
4 Comments:
A very powerful post. And I would love to meet your brother. They say home is where your heart is and even though my family doesn't have a problem with me being gay they have problems to accept the way I am or chose to live my life. Therefor, like many others, I found friends that are considered my true family. And it is indeed very comforting to spend time with people that see you for who you are and you don't have to pretend.
I agree with you, Anna. Most of my friends are definitely more my family than my biological relatives are.
Also, you're lucky to have people in your life who you ARE biologically related to who accept you. In my family, "stretching the limits" of gender and sexuality are bad. That's why I reach out to people who I know will accept me. Like you, P! :D
I don't know how to express this... Where does it come from that to love our family members that we have to "approve" of them. Does it come from the "tough love" theory? Although we do wish to help others live healthy lives, is it necessary to hold at arms' length those we don't understand? Isn't it more important that we all live whole lives, truthful lives, loving lives?
I just have to say that I love your photos. I have fallen in love with the one on the old dark window with the bright light on the other side. You are truly gifted in many ways.
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